We know empowerment when we see it. Energy is strong. Confidence comes easily. Presence and personality are unyielding. An empowered person seems to move with less effort and less force, yet when observed closely, the results show the opposite - they break through walls and overcome obstacles as if it’s what they were born to do. In observing empowered people, there is a juxtaposition of what have been traditionally seen as neutral or acceptable traits and disruptive or unacceptable traits. There is typically a positive vibe surrounding those who are neutral, accommodating and even-keeled, while in general, those who show up as disruptive, headstrong, or argumentative receive more outside judgement and negative feelings towards their ideas and actions. The individual who is empowered walks the balance between these dynamic traits, rising into their individual strengths, continuously breaking through walls, and embracing their freedom to claim their life and their right to be empowered.
Your personal journey toward empowerment is unbound by the opinions and impressions of others. There will be those who respect and appreciate your efforts and passions in life. There will be those who are threatened or bothered by your refusal to accommodate them. If you are truly rising up and claiming your life, the energy of those who see you positively will outweigh those who see you negatively. But we all run the risk of perceiving and believing the complete opposite - of allowing our fear to claim our life, rather than claiming our life for ourselves. The fear of being viewed in a negative way can cause us to turn away from our true path and sink back into our shells. And by doing so, we turn our backs on our muse. No matter how grandiose or practical your true muse is, becoming empowered is vital to fully rising up in your highest expression of self. It requires that you learn to walk the tightrope between those “acceptable” and “disruptive” traits. It’s a challenging journey to get to this point, but once you make the decision and commitment to walk that line, the worry of outside judgement falls away. You discover that walking in empowerment is actually easier than allowing the judgement to creep in...because to be empowered is to be YOU...living in full alignment with your truth, your special purpose in life.
You own the right to feel empowered, no matter who you are. Empowerment does not discriminate against age, education, race or gender. All that matters is what’s inside of your heart and soul and your willingness to be strong and confident in claiming who you are. Start by observing yourself for a week. Take note of the times when you are behaving or speaking in a manner that feels really good in your heart. You feel completely fired up or completely at peace. There are no layers to camouflage what you are really feeling or thinking. It’s the real you showing up. Document these moments in time to refer back to. Then, do the exact same thing, but with the opposite observation. Acknowledge those moments when you are behaving or speaking in a way that makes you feel unsettled or out of place - behavior that does not align with who you truly are. You are layering on the fake charm or switching conversations to avoid conflict because you don’t want to upset anyone. What you really want to say is different than what you actually say. How you really feel is different than how you act. Document these moment as well, and compare them to your previous list.
In observing the differences between the two lists, you have a choice to make. You can continue to live as is, with the understanding that your current actions will not lead to your empowered muse, or you can start to put in the work to shift your conversations and behaviors towards the real you. In no way does this mean that you call up all of your friends and give them a piece of your mind. Being empowered is not about asserting dominance or constantly proving you are “right”. It’s about maintaining a steady confidence in who you are, and allowing others to do the same without giving up pieces of your muse. So, no need to go Terminator here! But you can start to shift the manner in which you allow people in your life, and the way you share parts of yourself with those you do allow in. If you have a friend who you have to consistently fake the funk with, change the frequency and time with that individual so it’s reduced to time where you can be you and enjoy them. Yes, some people need to go completely, but use the guidance of your inner voice, of what’s in your heart, to make the proper shifts. Most importantly, remember the environments and people you were around when you felt the most passionate, happy and peaceful...magnify your time in those spaces! This is where the juice is. The more time you spend drinking that juice, the more it will fuel you and the stronger you will become in showing up fully confident as yourself.
Although you become stronger and more confident by drinking the juice, your opposition will simultaneously become stronger. It’s scary. You might feel lonely, judged or even like an outsider, having a hard time relating to others. It’s part of the growth process, and the work you put into those challenges builds up your resilience. This behind-the-scenes effort propels you into empowerment, and manifests as what others see as “effortless” success. They might not see the work happening, but you know and feel the transformative power of it in your soul. If you do feel alienated in the process, seek support in those who embody empowerment themselves, or those who encourage you to keep seeking it for yourself. This comes hand in hand with the concept of allowing people to come and go in your life, based on how they energize you. There is a common misconception, especially among women, that we have to be “alike” in order to be “aligned” - but becoming empowered looks different on everyone. Empowered women are speaking at rallies, editing films, managing households, volunteering at animal shelters, serving lattes, and everything in between - what links them together is their commitment to claiming their life, owning their choices, and respecting everyone’s potential to do the same. Surround yourself with these empowered women - the ones who encourage you to make the choice that differs from theirs, but leads you to a shared sense of strength and confidence.
You must also push yourself to deal with the challenges of becoming empowered independently - seek out articles, books, music and other connective points to push through the pain or confusion. Think about those everyday moments where you feel a little lost or uncomfortable, like when something in your house breaks. The fix is often within your scope of capabilities, you just need more information to bridge the gap of what you already know and the small portion of information needed to complete the fix. You find a tutorial on Youtube and grab supplies from the hardware store. It takes time, but you figure it out and complete the fix. And then you feel accomplished because you depended on yourself and your own faculties. Sometimes, the tools and knowledge that we gain on our own are the very experiences that build self-confidence and self-reliance, better equipping us for the next hiccup life throws our way. This is paramount in finding your path towards empowerment. It is self-earned, self-taught and can only be owned by you and you alone. And once you break through and see the light on the other side, you will stand up fully in your power knowing that you have arrived. You have claimed your life. You are EMPOWERED.
Rashanna Moss & Shannon Pike
Founders, Moderna Muse
For more information on our upcoming event, EMPOWERED, visit the Events page. This wellness experience will take you to the depths of your strength in body and mind!