“She’s such a b****!” You’ve heard the phrase, and you’ve likely said it yourself. And you know what, maybe she is one. But I would also venture to say that we use this phrase more than it’s deserved. I’m not suggesting that we excuse being rude and callous, but I do think it’s important to examine when we use it and how we are interpreting the actions of others when we do. The motivation behind this examination is to gather in our strength and support it, rather than condemn it.
A female who exudes confidence, displays strength, and speaks directly seems to be a lot to handle in our society. Yet, these are the same traits that are praised in men. Times are changing, especially with the current events, and it’s great to see this shift forming around us. But as women, why has there ever been such a big disconnect and acceptance of labeling each other as the “B word”? We share so many life experiences and challenges, that our tendency to tear one another down is truly sad. And the reality is, when you have committed to a goal and you have laser focus, your lack of time to accommodate others can catapult you to the b**** label.
The end of our 2018 #mindfulmuse challenge on social media has been all about commitment. Commitment is part of the natural progression of working your plan. It means that you stay the course of your vision, and in order to do so, some things have to be eliminated from your life. There are 24hrs in a day, and how you spend them matters. If you are committed to a new goal, spending your time the same way you used to spend it will not move you towards accomplishing that goal. Maybe you shifted the way you eat, ramped up your workouts, and increased the amount of time you spend on productivity and sleep. With those increases comes a decrease in social time, entertaining those who are negative influences in your life, and engaging in activities that don’t contribute to your goals. Your plate is super full, and your commitment and focus comes with a huge price. Your intentions are good and in alignment with your purpose in life, but know that it does cause issues.
If you are the woman who walks tall, speaks directly and does not accommodate sub-par behaviors, you are very likely to be labeled as a b**** - simply because you are not accommodating or speaking in a manner that the opposite party desires. If your intentions are pure and you are working to become the best version of yourself, I hope that you remain committed despite the possible labeling. It is not your duty in life to play a role that someone else wants you to play. The only role you need to play is the one in your heart and soul. Become it proudly and try not to get distracted by the labels.
On the contrary...if you are that person who likes to assign the label, you might want to pause and look at yourself for a second. Are you misinterpreting her actions and intentions? Is this woman paving the way for you and other women with a dream? Could you learn something from her and benefit from the same level of commitment? I just want to challenge us as women to not only bond in the bad times, but to also bond and support each other during the grind. Commitment takes a lot of work, perseverance and consistency. It changes our relationships, but none of it is personal. Make the space for others to create the life and environment needed to pursue their purpose so that the same can be done for you. One nation, one musa at a time!
CEO & Executive Visionary